Another All-Time Worst Song - Period

To say that Stakka Bo's "Here We Go" is bad just doesn't even begin to cut it. This is by far one of the most fitting selections for our hall of shame. Don't let the video fool you -- this is poison for the earhole.

Here we go again
here we go go go
to the temple of consumption
get your gear and start to spend
here we go go go with total dedication

As some sort of prototypes I serve to be
you see tomorrow's dream has never been part of me
consume today and leave the rest behind you
tomorrow's a surprise party buy a ticket too
c'mon
faster livin' faster live as fast as you're able
you better eat the food while it's still
hot on the table spend if you can

the greens are burning in your pocket
if you spend it right now you'll get as high as a rocket

Everything you don't use will loose it's value tomorrow
consume to much today and you can always borrow
this paradigm's the best one since the day of creation
get your gear and shape up this is the ... ?
shop till you drop has built this civilization
don't believe what you hear 'bout the next generation
if you go with a lot of toys you'll slip away a happy man
the greens are burning in you pockets just spend it while you can
The moon and the stars they all look down on me and say
there's a correlation between tomorrow and today
I say you won't gain a thing on that sick repudiation
we're right here right now that's the only situation
you can't fool me we live on borrowed time
so I spend the funds I have down to the nickel and dime
check it in check it out it's not a matter of contention
get your gear shape up and join the church of consumption

Use it in wear it out than throw it all away
go get yourself a new one all you gotta do is pay
because the more I will get the more I will own
with a lot of things around me I won't never fell alone
I work around the check just to earn my livin'
and I wanna get I won't spend my funds on givin'
now I'm acting irresponsible is that what you say
hey
somalia got my toaster just the other day

This joins the ever-growing ranks for the sorry. The list so far:

Believe by Cher
What it's Like by Everlast
Invisible by Clay Aiken
You're Beautiful by James Blunt
Home by Three Days Grace
Ants Marching by Dave Matthews Band
Over and Over by Nelly (featuring Tim McGraw)
Deacon Blues by Steely Dan
Blinded by the Light by Manfred Mann
All Out of Love by Air Supply
Ricky Don't Lose That Number by Steely Dan
Roll to Me by Del Amitri
Supersonic by JJ Fad
Glycerine by Bush

Hey, you know that one ....

I keep telling you about with the beards? Well, this is it.

Enjoy

Yuck

While this may not yet reach the level of All-Time Worst Song, it is rather awful.

This one is popping up no matter where you turn your head, and I for one would like to see it go the way of all the other inflated payola crapola.

Here for your unenjoyment is a heaping, steaming pile:

Remember Mentos?

Long before people were putting these things in Coke, shaking the bottle and filming the results for Internet broadcast, they were enjoying their humorless and annoying commercials. The Foo Fighters spoofed all the ads with their video for "Big Me." Here are the lyrics:

when I talk about it
it carries on
reasons only knew
when I talk about it
aries or treasons all renew

big me to talk about it
I could stand to prove
if we can get around it
I know that it's true

when I talked about it
carried on
reasons only knew

but it's you I fell into

well I talked about it
put it on
never was it true
but it's you I fell into

All-Time Worst Songs - Period

Yet another addition to the "All-Time Worst Songs - Period" list. This time: Glycerine by Bush. This song is terrible, and the video is equally poor. Sucky.

This one joins these other sorry songs:

Believe by Cher
What it's Like by Everlast
Invisible by Clay Aiken
You're Beautiful by James Blunt
Home by Three Days Grace
Ants Marching by Dave Matthews Band
Over and Over by Nelly (featuring Tim McGraw)
Deacon Blues by Steely Dan
Blinded by the light by Manfred Mann
All Out of Love by Air Supply
Ricky Don't Lose That Number by Steely Dan
Supersonic by JJ Fad

Ha ha

All-Time Worst Songs -- Period (so far)

Believe by Cher
What it's Like by Everlast
Invisible by Clay Aiken
You're Beautiful by James Blunt
Home by Three Days Grace
Ants Marching by Dave Matthews Band
Over and Over by Nelly (featuring Tim McGraw)
Deacon Blues by Steely Dan
Blinded by the light by Manfred Mann
All Out of Love by Air Supply
Ricky Don't Lose That Number by Steely Dan

All-Time Worst Songs - Period

And the newest addition is . . . Over and Over by Nelly (featuring Tim McGraw). Add this one to the following:

Deacon Blues by Steely Dan
Blinded by the light by Manfred Mann
All Out of Love by Air Supply
Ricky Don't Lose That Number by Steely Dan

W N T E . . . . The Next Generation

It's customary to expect some changes to occur when an established program switches networks. And Where Not To Eat (WNTE) is no exception.

But this time, I don't really have much in the way of radical departures. So, enjoy a more traditional installment courtesy of your friends and mine -- WFMY News:

Los Catrachos - A "huge" roach problem and employees smoking in the kitchen. Los Catrachos' permit was suspended "due to the fact of no hot water."
(NOTE: Apparently hot water is necessary to combat huge roaches.)

Bojangles - An employee eating while working; "effective hair restraints must be worn properly" -- a problem noted three times before.
(NOTE: Bojangles' new menu options include half-eaten entrees as well as New Orleans-style hairy dishes. Yummy!)

Billy Bob's Silver Diner - Pans not cleaned thoroughly and cutting boards need to be replaced.
(NOTE: I find it hard to believe that any establishment with "Billy Bob" in the name could be harboring some kind of improper food preparation measures. It's just unthinkable . . . )

You've had the yin, now here's the yang

As a natural progression of our "All-Time Worst Songs - Period" awards, I now introduce the opportunity for you stuff the ballot box with "You Gotta Hear It" tunes. Let us know what's great or what you like -- I won't argue with you about it (just don't try to slip in one of the other All Stars).

To get it started:

Balloting begins today ....

As an online community, I believe we can come together to collectively notify the world that there is some truly bad music out there . . . tunes to be avoided.

So beginning today, right here and now, I am opening the ballot box for the "All-Time Worst Songs - Period." These titles would be the ones in Hell's jukebox . . . these are the only selections Hitler can punch up in that great Eternal Infernal Waffle House.

I'm not looking to argue song merits or artist talent -- I simply want to know what you think sucks out loud. You can make your selections in the comment box or send me an email to notblogger@gmail.com, and I'll post them here later.

To get things rolling, I submit to you:

DEACON BLUES by Steely Dan from the album "AJA" (1977)

This is the day
Of the expanding man
That shape is my shade
There where I used to stand
It seems like only yesterday
I gazed through the glass
At ramblers
Wild gamblers
That's all in the past

You call me a fool
You say it's a crazy scheme
This one's for real
I already bought the dream
So useless to ask me why
Throw a kiss and say goodbye
I'll make it this time
I'm ready to cross that fine line

CHORUS:
I'll learn to work the saxophone
I'll play just what I feel
Drink Scotch whisky all night long
And die behind the wheel
They got a name for the winners in the world
I want a name when I lose
They call Alabama the Crimson Tide
Call me Deacon Blues

My back to the wall
A victim of laughing chance
This is for me
The essence of true romance
Sharing the things we know and love
With those of my kind
Libations
Sensations
That stagger the mind

I crawl like a viper
Through these suburban streets
Make love to these women
Languid and bittersweet
I'll rise when the sun goes down
Cover every game in town
A world of my own
I'll make it my home sweet home

CHORUS

This is the night
Of the expanding the man
I take one last drag
As I approach the stand
I cried when I wrote this song
Sue me if I play too long
This brother is free
I'll be what I want to be

CHORUS

Toasty panda

Songs You Know By Heart (beer, sports)

Seen that Budweiser Select ad where virtually everything in the world is shaped like the corporate logo? No? Then you haven't been watching sporting events on TV lately.

The tune is none other than The Chemical Brother's "Galvanizes," and it features Q-Tip from A Tribe Called Quest.

Songs You Know By Heart (telecom, movies)

Bellsouth wants you to be stuck in the middle with someone. Back in the 1970s, Stealer's Wheel was "Stuck in the Middle with You."

This one's got everything: cow bell, freaky food eating and film prominence. What more could you ask for?

Here are the lyrics:

Well, I don't know why I came here tonight
I got a feelin' that something ain't right
I'm so scared in case I fall off my chair
And I'm wonderin' how I'll get down those stairs
Clowns to left of me, jokers to the right
Here am I stuck in the middle with you

Yes, I'm stuck in the middle with you
And I'm wonderin' what it is I should do
It's so hard to keep this smile from my face
Losin' control, I'm all over the place
Clowns to left of me, jokers to the right
Here am I stuck in the middle with you

Well, you started off with nothing
And you're proud that you're a self-made man
And your friends they all come crawling
Slap you on the back and say
Please, please

Well, I'm stuck in the middle with you
And I'm wonderin' what it is I should do
Is it cool to go to sleep on the floor?
I don't think that I can take it anymore
Clowns to left of me, jokers to the right
Here am I stuck in the middle with you

Well, you started off with nothing
And you're proud that you're a self-made man
And your friends they all come crawling
Slap you on the back and say
Please, please

Well, I don't know why I came here tonight
I got a feelin' that something ain't right
I'm so scared in case I fall off my chair
And I'm wonderin' how I'll get down those stairs
Clowns to left of me, jokers to the right
Here am I stuck in the middle with you
Here I am stuck in the middle with you
Yes, I'm stuck in the middle with you
Stuck in the middle with you